When there is a lot of arguing, sometimes decreasing the tension can be about improving other areas of the relationship. Here are two powerful ways to avoid marriage killing arguments:
Step #1: Enhance the friendship in your relationship
Do you treat your spouse as if he/she is your best friend?
Generally speaking, when we talk to best friends, we want to know what’s going on in their lives. We regularly ask them: “What have been up to?” We get excited about their triumphs and validate their concerns. Right?
If something is not going the way they expected it to go. We also hope that our best friends are able to achieve their dreams. Don’t we?
Remaining curious, celebrating together, validating concerns, and helping our friends to reach their life dreams, are some of the main components of a solid friendship.
Now, look at your relationship. Are any of these components missing or weak with your significant other?
Step # 2: Create shared meaning
Do you have traditions you share regularly?
Traditions are a great way to create shared meaning in the relationship. These can be adopted daily or center around holidays and vacations. Daily traditions may include things such as: having dinner together, having a glass of wine after the children go to sleep, or giving each other feet or back rubs before going to sleep.
Holidays and vacationing give us the opportunity to use, modify, combine or eliminate traditions that were held with our family of origin.
Need help to stop fighting and bring peace and fulfillment to your Relationship?
I specialize in mending relationships, I can help.
Just like when you have a heart condition, you look for a cardiologist, when it comes to your relationship, you need a Relationship Expert.
Here are the types of couples I have helped the most over the years:
• Couples who know that they want to be together but know that the arguments are out of control.
• Couples who are wondering whether divorce is the only solution. I help them figure out if that’s the answer, and if it’s not I give them the tools to have a better relationship than ever before.
• Couples who have a pretty good relationship but have one or two “hot topics” that stir the pot. I help them navigate these topics with less conflict and resentment.